i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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