I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize