4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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