..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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