So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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