do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize