remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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