Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
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I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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