Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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