I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
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