Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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