ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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