My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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