how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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