He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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