did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize