i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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