she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
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Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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