I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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