I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
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all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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