I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
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There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
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Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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