it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
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my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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