Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
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