It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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