I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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