so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Dicks are not precious.
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