yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
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