I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
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