My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
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Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
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I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
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