just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
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I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
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The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize