whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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