My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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