your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
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