you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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