it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
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We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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