I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Randomize