I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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