i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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