im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize