Kiss
Puke
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
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Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
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Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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