Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
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Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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