a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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