he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
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