I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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