It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
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Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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