Where did you get a picture of my penis
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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