wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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