I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize