I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize