would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize